Thoughts about Pregnancy #3

Maybe because I am in the middle of it, I feel like this is my hardest pregnancy yet. 

Not all because of pregnancy issues, although that is half of it, but because of other circumstanses in our life.

I have two other kids.  One who I still view as a baby, even though he just turned two.  So it's weird that I'm going to have another baby. 

I've been sick a lot.  Besides the fact that Liam and I seem to get everything under the sun, I had morning sickness that just never seemed to go away.  I felt like it did get better, and I just had food aversions.  Then I found out I have gestational diabetes.  It is controlled fine by diet, but I do think if I could do it over I would have asked to be tested earlier.  It may have been the reason I felt so bad so often.  That said, there are still days that I don't feel well after a meal (or all day long) that don't make any sort of sense and don't seem to be tied to me spiking my blood sugar (because I haven't).  I am 36 weeks pregnant and I still get queezy.  I have to say I never thought that would happen to me.

I have often reflected that these things are quite enough to be getting on with.  Then, in August, I went back to work.  I applied for my former bosses position, who had retired.  I knew I had a decent chance at it.  I was frustrated because I was not in a place in my life where I really wanted to go back to work.  I also was aware that we could use the income.  Bills temporary job at PAML ended on Halloween, earlier than we expected, so it's been helpful.  We actually have benefits and it is somewhat flexible.  There are so many things that went along with this decision.  I was a mess the two weeks before I started.  I am probationary for 6 months so fun times trying to figure out how to keep my benefits and have some time off.   What I learned about myself.  I have no problem with this job.  It does turn out that push come to shove I am not happier at work then at home.  (Its possible I'm not happier at home then at work either) and that if all things were equal I would go back home.  I did not grow up planning to be a stay at home parent.  So sometimes it surprises me that this would be my choice.

It's just not been an easy pregnancy friends!  I am very much looking forward to feeling like a human being, and being able to eat without getting sick.  I'm hoping the rest of my pregnancy goes well and that this little guy is a healthy baby.