2016 election, done

I had so many things I wanted to say after yesterday's election.  I kept checking my phone where I was following the federal and local results.
I was floored. . .absolutely floored when Mr. Trump came in ahead. . .along with what seems like most of my friends.
Monday I had picked up the sermon notes from my kids daycare, which is in a church.  I worked through some of the scriptures and thought questions and I knew at the end who I could NOT vote in for President although I still felt unsure about who to vote for.
One quote that I want to pass on however is this. . ."No one political party has a corner on the will of God"  It was a good reminder to me to do my research and make the best decision I could without feeling bad about it.  None of them are perfect.  And God is truly the only one that can heal some of our problems.  Until then we must extend love, Christ's love, and compassion to people of all genders, ages, races, sexual orientations.  We have to provide for the poor and sick.  We must emotionally, physically, spiritually support pregnant women.  We must be educated and extend education to others.
Life can be so hard.  We are all broken. We need each other.  Help hold together your neighbors.  Together we can make a difference.

Gratitude!

I recently read the book "Heaven Is Here" by Stephanie Nielson. 

I've been struggling with several things over the last 4 or 5 months.  The result of which has been mostly a lack of desire to pray, attend church or work on faith in any way.  I missed my "faithful" life, but I also needed to spend some time sitting back and remembering who I am and what I think.  I needed to reconcile some of that with my faith life.

While reading "Heaven Is Here" my first reaction was mixed.  I had a hard time enjoying the perfect storytale life in the beginning.  When I finished the book however I  mostly felt gratitude that she shared her story.  Not even in overcoming her incredible trial, which was a well told in itself.  But by the end I felt a small kindled flame of gratitude for my life.  Gratitude for being a mother to my children and a wife to my husband even though some days are hard and I hate doing the dishes.  Right now, I find that I hate them less.  There is nothing wrong with what I am currently spending my time on, which is mostly raising children and fighting the mess.  I felt a greater desire to take care of myself and to enjoy what my body is capable of today.

Also, I realized how much I am going to be thankful to look back on my journals and my family blog and remember the little things about our life.  It is a beautiful, busy life, filled with little hands and voices that I do not want to forget. 

So here I am.

On feeling lonely

This afternoon I have an odd loneliness in my heart.  Honestly, it began with my neighbors leaving for the weekend.  Just the weekend.  But every time I look out my window it feels like something is missing.  The it continues with an odd dream I had.  This happens occasionally, I have a dream that messes up my emotions for a whole day.  I don't get spiritual message dreams, just odd emotional dreams.  And the moment when I think of a friend of mine who  moved rather suddenly two weeks ago.  I can't stop by.  She isn't there anymore.

Today, I attended church for 30 minutes, to take the sacrament and drop off some things for Primary.  Then I came home so I would be sure to have a few minutes with my dad before he left.   He's been visiting this weekend from Oregon, we've been fishing and playing  and working.

Now he's headed home.  I'm at the end of a 9 day stay-cation with my kids (back to work tomorrow) and the odd lonely feeling hits.  If I were to be honest, I recognize the feeling.  It happens to me every time one of my parents leaves after a visit.

Thankfully, it won't last very long, this lonely hole.  Tomorrow morning my husband starts a new job with a new schedule and the next couple of weeks will be busy and tiring with us figuring out the new normal routine for us.  I won't have too much time to dwell on this experience and loneliness will be filled with busy fullness.

Until then, I just have to take a minute to reflect on our many blessings of loving family.  Pray for healing from a loving God who has the power to make me full.

My little talker and the sacrament

My little boy loves to talk!  I'm amazed at the sentances that come out of his mouth sometimes.  He has two older siblings and a mom and dad to teach him I suppose!

This Sunday we made it to church early enough to go inside the chapel.  (I honestly don't remember the last time we all sat in the chapel together!)  Our kids did very well squeezed into our little row.  Nathan folds his little hands together during prayers now.  During the prayer for the water he sat in Daddys lap with his hands folder together.  At the end he said "Amen!"

And then...

"Amen."

"Amen!"

And THEN got really excited and tried to stand up and hollered,

"Yay!  Water!"

It was the sweetest thing ever!

I recently attended my cousins wedding in the Boise area.  They decided to take communion as a couple at the end of the ceremony as a celebration of Gods goodness and forgiveness in their lives.

What if we felt that in our lives?  That sweet, unhindered joy in Jesus Christ.  Excitement at being made clean each week by partaking of the sacrament? What if inside we were celebrating, "Yay! The water is coming!"  How would that change our experience of taking the sacrament?

Updates on the mini units

At Halloween. . . I can't remember what Liam wanted to be.  But a few days before Halloween he wanted to be a ghost.  A "scary ghost" he said when I asked.  I scrambled around, found a pillow case and some white face paint.  He got one look at his face painted and wanted it off! 
So he wore a tigger sweater and was Tigger...sort of...this last year.

Nathan for a long time loved to waive bye bye to mommy in the morning when she leaves for work.  He still doesn't have any more teeth.
He says many words.  He'll try most things, but the fun ones are when he calls out for Liam or Miriam...sometimes it is hard to tell which one he's hollering.  But today he said, "Liam, Miriam, where are you?" 
He loves to push toy lawn mowers or ride little cars.
We are having a little trouble with hitting with this one.
His favorite foods are blueberries and strawberries.  He says "Bees!" but it means berries.  He also likes beans and olives, but he calls olives beans.
He's gotten pretty determined and knows what he wants.  He's a strong boy.
Only in the last month or so has he developed a bit of separation anxiety.  He cries in nursery even when I am there.  All of a sudden he wanted to go with me to work and was telling grandma "bye, bye!"  from my arms instead of running to the window.
He says "amen" when I put him to bed with a prayer.


Liam...has not yet potty trained.  He was doing really well with pee pee, but after a few weeks just decided not to do it.  I'm not sure what to do yet.  It's been quite a while since he would go regularly.
Liam loves his brother.  One morning I caught him throwing balls into the baby's crib so the baby could throw them back out.  And they were loving it.
Liam loves to color. 
He is an amazing listener, and really looks out for Nathan.
That said he's gotten to the age where sometimes he really doesn't want to listen/obey!  When he gets upset at you for not understanding him, or doesn't want to do something, he crosses his little arms and says,  "Humph!" while pouting.  It's, unfortunately for me, very cute.
He still has one of the best smiles ever!

Miriam.   I can't believe she is 7 1/2.  She is almost done with 1st grade. 
She is improving with reading all of a sudden.  Just starting to take off!
She seems to like math.
She loves drawing and painting and making.  She is a very innovative person!  If she doesn't have what she needs she makes it out of what she has.
She has plans for her next 2 or 3 birthdays, hello kitty, my little pony...
She is super excited about being the friend invited to her friends next birthday, which is going to the theatre and going out to mcdonalds.

I love these memories. 

Updates on the parental units

I know I can never keep up with everything that has gone on in the last year. This post is adult recaps:

 I really struggled July - October.  The very short version of this story was that I wasn't taking care of myself or dealing with my stress very well.  I went on an antidepressant in October, which helped.  I learned that I clench my jaw and occasionally grind my teeth, so I go back and forth wearing a mouth guard at night.  Basically I wear it until I start having headaches again, then I quit wearing it...until I get headaches again.  It's all trial and error, and it's odd, but really helping. 

Hubby went back to work in late November. I don't think that the job is quite everything he hoped for at that time.  But him working is good.  And hopefully he will find a path.   My grandmother has been helping us with the boys.  She is amazing. 

Hubs has also been having some struggle with his neck and has been getting some steroid shots and PT.  Someone suggested to him that he work with the VA and also consider asking about veterans disability.  We will see.

Little Wookie is 1!

My little baby is one year old!  It's amazing! And went by so fast!

He's a big boy, 22.5 pounds, 31 inches tall.  I'm certain that is our largest baby to date, not sure if he's the tallest.

At 11 months, he started walking.  I feel like he caught on very quickly and now he's very good at getting around on his own. 

Also at 11 months, he started getting teeth, and got several all at once.  He got the bottom front two, then one on top front, then two on top (on either side of the top front teeth) and finally the other top front tooth.  Whew!  He's teething pretty well, which I am glad for, poor Liam always had such a tough time getting teeth.

He says a few words like "kitty" and "ball" - "ba ba ba"  He also says "ba ba" for bottle.  I've heard him say "my baba" before.  He also says "dada" and "mama" or "mom"

He loves to feed himself.  He doesn't want much to do with baby food because he really wants to feed himself.  He's tried some meats now.

He goes to bed with a bottle and a blanket.  Tonight, he brought his blanket up to daddy while holding his bottle at bedtime and looked at daddy like, "hey, it's bedtime"  He's usually ready to go to bed right at 7pm.  It's bedtime!

His favorite toys are balls (he'll drop almost anything else if he sees one) and maybe blocks.  He also loves bath time. 

He is a super good baby.  I feel so lucky that he is in our family and that he is mine!